A Bend in the Road

Finding power in culture and curation.

Recently, someone who means a lot to me transferred a big ol’ Santa Claus-sized sack of heaviness from their back to mine. All I can do is stare at this metaphorical boulder and let it be in the same “room” as me. I know I will eventually open the sack, examine the items in it, and decide what to keep and throw away. The contents will dissipate, and no one will have to carry it around anymore. At least, that’s my hope. 

In the meantime, I’m working hard not to let the weight of this thing become my personality. I am noticing the pull of music in helping me to feel more secure in my footing, to process emotion, and to keep me power-filled. I guess music has always been that for me — a loving, supportive embrace. If I’m in a dark place, it feels good to commiserate with sad tunes. If I’m feeling happy, the music takes me even higher. If I don’t know what to think or feel, it helps me to get out of my head and back into my body.

“Power-filled” is not my term but I love thinking about self-care this way. When distressed or distraught, what activities give you a renewed sense of energy and agency? Being in nature, drinking tea, sitting in the sunlight, watching the birds and trees, cooking something, writing in my journal, reading, listening to music, watching a nostalgic show like “Twin Peaks” with my kiddo  — I’m learning that these are the things that help me regulate. (I know I’m extremely late to the game with some of these realizations lol.)

Cue mellow-dramatic interlude:

It’s eye-opening to note the role of culture here because until recently I could not put my finger on why music always felt so soothing to me. This is something I’d like to explore more in this Substack: how culture like music intersects with psychology, healing, and concepts I’m encountering for the first time through my self-exploration (your girl only just learned what “equanimity” means 🙈).

Many of the people I’ve featured here on Mia’s Queue already understand how culture and consciousness are connected. As a practice, they put a premium on acting with intention when choosing what to feed their minds and bodies. They know that curation makes a big difference to one’s quality of life and mental health and that sharing their finds with others is an act of love. 

I hope you’ll stay along for the ride as I begin to alternate interviews with pieces that explore the intersection of culture, curation, and what I can only describe as self-expansion. I plan to publish weekly, giving myself the grace to occasionally skip if I need to, and keep all posts free. (I had payments turned on for a while, awkwardly not knowing how to acknowledge the kind handful who purchased paid subscriptions. Turns out that accepting money created too much pressure; I froze. So while I’m grateful for those who supported me, not taking payments feels more supportive of my creative practice right now.) 

Anyway, if my detour into some new topics isn’t what you signed up for, no problem to skedaddle of course! I just wanted to take a moment to be upfront about where I’m at and where I’m going, and to reassure you that inspiring recommendations from people who care are still at the core of this newsletter. Ultimately, I’d never let the woo overpower the Wu. But now I understand that they are also deeply connected.

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⛽️ Links filling me up right now

🎧 This is the playlist I currently have on repeat. I named it “Solar Panels” because warmth and light have energy-charging powers. I’ve been exploring a lot more ambient and experimental music lately, and this is where it seems to be finding its home.

😹 Humor and silliness are dear to me as coping skills. I am a card-carrying member of the “Dead Horse Club,” a group of friends who like to recycle the same jokes ad infinitum. IYKYK. This TED Talk is a great reminder to keep it light and celebrate the absurd from an artist introduced to me by my mother.

💄 I loved hearing RuPaul on Fresh Air. I don’t plan to read his memoir so this was the fix I needed to understand his raison d’etre. I love how he talks about love. He broke up with his partner so they could both get sober; they reunited once they took care of themselves. Imagine the strength to do that! Then again, as Ru himself says: “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you gonna love somebody else?”

Anyway, thanks for reading. I hope this wasn’t TMI. I’m excited to explore new emotional + curatorial territory here. Maybe you are too?

More Mia’s Queue: Stella • Lesa • Kyle • Keith • Cecily • Raymond • Marisa • Andy • Sebene • Gil • Alison • Alexis • Storey • Meg • Sadia • Kel • Tracy • Theresa • Vasha • Eva • Sarah • James • Adi • Letitia